I am talking here about a different kind of reaction, and to something physical, not to the Gods, although I guess I could argue that everything involves the Gods in some way. Yesterday, I awoke to a nice day, a Sunday, no work, my birds chirping happily in their cages, and everything fairly normal, the way I like it. I had to do a little cleaning, a little vacuuming, a little dish washing, but that's all a normal part of life. I did some web surfing, some TV watching, listened to some music, meditated, and did a little reading.
But something happened in the afternoon that shook me. I walked into the kitchen and noticed that something was wrong with one of my bids. A female cockatiel who'd taken on the name Missy. Normally, I don't name birds. They do not respond to names, unless they are parrots, and even then I am not sure they do, but as I went on, I found that I was always referring to these two as buddy and missy, so they became Buddy and Missy.
She was not breathing normally, and as the minutes passed, it got worse and worse until finally, I reached into the cage. I knew right away it was deadly serious because she did not try to get away. Missy was much friendlier than Buddy in that respect. If she was out and flying around, she would get on my hand, and she had no problem climbing onto my shoulder, or even my head, but normally when reaching into the cage, both she and buddy would not want picked up. This time, however, she did not move or struggle, and her breathing was a horrible loud wheezing. I tried to get her to drink some water, but she would not take any. Just minutes later I watched as the life drained out of her.
Missy is gone.
My reaction was not subtle.
I am not an emotional person. I am not prone to crying or even lots of any other emotions, but I had some kind of weird semi-crying semi angry mess. I am not sure how to explain it, but this little bird had provided me with something that is now missing, and I find myself saddened.
No comments:
Post a Comment