The Empress

I am the stillness of the night, when your heart beats loudly in your heart.
When the tension in your body has built to a crescendo.
I am your longing for companionship and friendship.
When the terrors of life lay claim to your spirit.

I am the stirring of the breese, when its very touch leaves you panting.
When your skin burns with the power of your emotion.
I am your desires, large and small, made manifest within you.
When your blood rushes loudly to your cock in your lusting for passion.

I am the light of the crescent moon, when it shines its light on your lover.
When the very sight of him incites spark and flame in your loins.
I am your intention made real as you approach him.
When your thoughts become rabid and bestial in heat.

I am the rising of the sun which, like love, has blinded you with its light.
When you have been bound to him, heart and soul.
I am the Empress and Goddess of desire, smelling of rose petals.
When in the end you realise you are now and forever mine.

Emotion

I will not attempt to explain emotion at a rational level. I would be hopelessly ill equipped to do so. We can try to rationalize emotion as the firing synapses, or the wash of chemicals as they are produced and reabsorbed in the brain, but that would be a wholly inadequate explanation. The randomness of emotion and thought cannot fully be explained, at least not to the satisfaction of so many who believe that there is more to life than simple bio-chemistry (that sounds odd coming from me, even to me) because the randomness of it is not really so random at all, rather it is what makes us us. It forms the very basis of what and who we are.

Those emotional and rational impulses that simply come, not hindered or provoked by anything in particular except that they come from us is where Aphrodite holds her seat of power. It is a seat of power far smaller and yet far more all encompassing than anything in the cosmos because in the end it is in all of us. Not just us thinking evolved creatures, but all creatures, great and small.

At this level, Aphrodite is at her most basic aspect. That aspect that is simply a spark. That initial spark that grows and becomes something so vastly complicated that only a goddess could actually understand it, but which we, mere mortals, can but feel and be swept away by it.

Beginning my time with Aphrodite

I have to admit that this blog is running all over the place. The idea of it is, of course, self discovery and because of that I promised myself that wherever my ramblings took me I would just go with it. That was the whole point, that by trying to focus my thoughts on a particular god, I could cause whatever it was in me that resonated with that god to come to the fore.

Sometimes that meant that some gods, like Poseidon, seemed to only resonate on a single or limited level in me. Only some small part of me that reached out for that deity and its influence, but in some, like Hestia, I found myself discovering that I lacked a connection with the place I lived because my heart was still in that place I left behind. That while I had made this place my physical home, I had yet to make it my spiritual home. It was a discovery worth making because it is slowly forcing me to establish deeper roots here, deeper relationships here, and a deeper understanding of this place, even if not always for the better.

Aphrodite, however, is going to prove especially challenging. I am a gay/bisexual man. By that I mean that I am gay, exclusively, but have bisexual tendencies. I consider women attractive, sexy, but do not feel that emotional, visceral connection with them that would make me want them further than as friends. Often good friends.

Being a man, and a gay man at that, means that I owe a great deal of my being, my personality, to this deity. The deity of sexuality, of lust and love, of the raw physical force that is sexual desire. We men, for the most part, think about sex all the time. You women out there may think that odd, but you may also think that when we say that, or when studies show that, that we are just staring at you, or other men, and picturing our cocks sliding in, but that’s not really it. Sometimes it is a kiss, or the feel of your skin, or the warmth of your breath on our necks.

Sex isn’t always so vulgar (not necessarily a bad thing) sometimes thoughts of a sexual nature are sweet and powerfully emotional, and they make us feel things all the time.

We men are highly emotional creatures, we just don’t express it the same way women do, and expecting us to do so is, I think, one of the faults women have because we accept the way you express emotion, it is only fair that you accept the way we do too.

But, this is about Aphrodite, and she is a goddess of immense importance and power in human existence. From day one, even before we were sapient creatures, we were sentient (feeling) and that is where Aphrodite lives. In emotion.

In you (to Aphrodite)

I am at your feet.
Basking in your beauty.
But I am bereft.

In you I have sought the wrong things.
In you I have sought release.
In you I have forgotten myself.

I am at your feet.
Trembling from desire.
But I am sad.

In you I have lusted after many.
In you I have many had.
In you I have climbed to the heights of ecstasy.

I am at your feet.
Crying in realization.
But I am relieved.

In you I have the ability to love.
In you I can seek it out.
In you I have hope.

Preparing for Aphrodite

Aphrodite is a biggie. Hers is a sphere of influence in the human world that is all pervasive. We acknowledge her power in our every day lives. All religions, no matter their source, see love and its many influential aspects, as the core of religious life.

We who are modern followers of the Hellenic Gods must acknowledge the sheer power of Aphrodite and its all pervasive influence on everything from our interactions with each other to our deepest desires. All based in this strange little emotion called Love.

Before I dive in to this amazing Goddess, to explore her, I must make a few clarifications. Eros, which the Greeks name as being there at the beginning, is a power different from Aphrodite. I see him as a power of gravitic proportions. A power that causes things to be drawn to one another, not necessarily with emotion.

To Aphrodite too is attributed a power that draws things together, but in a form different from Eros. It is an emotional power, and one that has its own Eros, its own erotic influence. Aphrodite is attributed with mothering Eros, who is the lesser eros, the little angelic figure that is erotic feeling, initial lust, love at first sight. This is an aspect of the great power that is love, but not an aspect of the primordial Eros.

So, having clarified that (I hope) I will move forward and seek her out.

Poseidon: In closing...

I have to admit that my exploration of Poseidon on my long road here is a bit lacking. I feel like I have been hit over the head with a specific aspect of Poseidon and no matter where I tried to move it always seemed to come back to that. His intrinsic fluidity.

This road I am on is not closed, however, and there is no reason I can’t come back to explore new aspects of Poseidon and the realm he inhabits in the cosmos.



Moving ahead means moving again across the lines of the star, and from Hera to Poseidon then places my next target as Aphrodite, a Goddess with whom I have had much congress (perhaps even too much) and it should be interesting exploring what it means to love and lust on the heels of exploring the concept of essential fluidity.